I've been trying to acknowledge my negative self-talk instead of just stuffing or replaying it, so I can answer it. Of course, I'm being too sensitive. But what I can I learn from my responses?
That I want my family to be proud of me. That I want to be perceived as professional and mature, or at least mature. That I want respect. And yet - that I don't want to have shallow, polished manners. That I don't want to be a slave to fashion or expense. That I do, in fact, WANT to challenge people's perceptions. To widen their experience. To give them other options for how to live, what to prioritize, how to love. To bring an air of freedom. To be authentic and refreshing. To be surprising. And to be comfortable enough with myself that I can admit all the appropriate facts, and even accept outright criticism, not balk at imagined scrutiny. You've got to help me, Free Spirit.
That I want my family to be proud of me. That I want to be perceived as professional and mature, or at least mature. That I want respect. And yet - that I don't want to have shallow, polished manners. That I don't want to be a slave to fashion or expense. That I do, in fact, WANT to challenge people's perceptions. To widen their experience. To give them other options for how to live, what to prioritize, how to love. To bring an air of freedom. To be authentic and refreshing. To be surprising. And to be comfortable enough with myself that I can admit all the appropriate facts, and even accept outright criticism, not balk at imagined scrutiny. You've got to help me, Free Spirit.
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